2008 Woodie Awards
Naked News
Jennifer DeMoss
Issue date: 4/23/07 Section: Inside WCC
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Three for two special
With the rising price of underwear these days, it seems perfectly natural for 43 year old Chong Leah Hin to be stealing bras. Hin almost got away with two bras belonging to the daughters of one Chow Eng Chuah, who saw the dainties disappear over the fence where they had been hung outside to dry. Chuah chased Hin, who fled the scene. I picture Chuah, dressed in pajamas, screaming, “Give me back my daughter’s underwear!” while a terrified yet defiant Hin glances over his shoulder long enough to retort, “Never!” Hin was given a three-month sentence for snatching the undergarments.
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MySpace blooper
When I was a teenager, my mother told me that if she ever found drugs in my room, she would call the cops. That’s why I hid them in my car. Just kidding! At least I wasn’t the young man whose father forced him to wear a sandwich-board sign that proclaimed he was a drug dealer. The 14 year-old had to parade back and forth in front of his Knoxville, Tenn., middle school so that his peers would know that he abused and sold marijuana and Oxycontin. Where did Dad find the information? MySpace! I want to give him a medal for being one of the only fathers interested enough in his kid to MONITOR HIS INTERNET ACTIVITY.
Website
Sign of the times
Eric Joswig has grander plans than could ever be accomplished with a mere sandwich-board. He has spent $10,000 on six billboards in the Tampa Bay, Fla., area to proclaim his love for his wife, Deborah. The billboards are an attempt to win back his wife’s love after years of infidelity. Can Eric steal Deborah’s heart back the way that he’s stolen her pride? I guess we’ll have to wait until they let us know with six-foot-tall letters on the side of the highway.
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Tentacled treats
You may have heard that the oceans’ fish stocks are being depleted. Soon there may be nothing left but jellyfish and creatures that no one wants to eat...until now. Enter jellyfish cookies. Created from a desire to commercialize sea animals that are traditionally seen as nuisances, the cookies are made from powdered Echizen kurage jellyfish. The food industries students who created the fishy cookies are also trying to make tofu (tofu?!) and fruit punch from the jellyfish. Three cheers for overfishing and human ingenuity!
Website
Multi-tasking at its finest
I’ve heard of secretaries getting carpal tunnel syndrome, but phone sex operators? Years ago, Marci Lyn Deutsch sued the Florida phone sex company she worked for because she was using her hands a lot on the job, to put it delicately. The story was considered an urban legend, but luckily the folks at The Washington Post dug up the facts and verified that Deutsch did receive a small settlement out of court for the excessive work she did with her hands. You know, dialing numbers and stuff like that.
Website
With the rising price of underwear these days, it seems perfectly natural for 43 year old Chong Leah Hin to be stealing bras. Hin almost got away with two bras belonging to the daughters of one Chow Eng Chuah, who saw the dainties disappear over the fence where they had been hung outside to dry. Chuah chased Hin, who fled the scene. I picture Chuah, dressed in pajamas, screaming, “Give me back my daughter’s underwear!” while a terrified yet defiant Hin glances over his shoulder long enough to retort, “Never!” Hin was given a three-month sentence for snatching the undergarments.
Website
MySpace blooper
When I was a teenager, my mother told me that if she ever found drugs in my room, she would call the cops. That’s why I hid them in my car. Just kidding! At least I wasn’t the young man whose father forced him to wear a sandwich-board sign that proclaimed he was a drug dealer. The 14 year-old had to parade back and forth in front of his Knoxville, Tenn., middle school so that his peers would know that he abused and sold marijuana and Oxycontin. Where did Dad find the information? MySpace! I want to give him a medal for being one of the only fathers interested enough in his kid to MONITOR HIS INTERNET ACTIVITY.
Website
Sign of the times
Eric Joswig has grander plans than could ever be accomplished with a mere sandwich-board. He has spent $10,000 on six billboards in the Tampa Bay, Fla., area to proclaim his love for his wife, Deborah. The billboards are an attempt to win back his wife’s love after years of infidelity. Can Eric steal Deborah’s heart back the way that he’s stolen her pride? I guess we’ll have to wait until they let us know with six-foot-tall letters on the side of the highway.
Website
Tentacled treats
You may have heard that the oceans’ fish stocks are being depleted. Soon there may be nothing left but jellyfish and creatures that no one wants to eat...until now. Enter jellyfish cookies. Created from a desire to commercialize sea animals that are traditionally seen as nuisances, the cookies are made from powdered Echizen kurage jellyfish. The food industries students who created the fishy cookies are also trying to make tofu (tofu?!) and fruit punch from the jellyfish. Three cheers for overfishing and human ingenuity!
Website
Multi-tasking at its finest
I’ve heard of secretaries getting carpal tunnel syndrome, but phone sex operators? Years ago, Marci Lyn Deutsch sued the Florida phone sex company she worked for because she was using her hands a lot on the job, to put it delicately. The story was considered an urban legend, but luckily the folks at The Washington Post dug up the facts and verified that Deutsch did receive a small settlement out of court for the excessive work she did with her hands. You know, dialing numbers and stuff like that.
Website
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